There is so much that is so often left unsaid or unplanned before it is too late, especially when it comes to talking about End-of-Life.

Elder members of family are often reticent about discussing their increasing fragility and the nearing inevitability with their family. Family members are equally likely to avoid raising the subject through their own fears.

Yet leaving everything unspoken just means we each hold onto our own fears and worries and the unspoken weighs on us like carrying a heavy sack everywhere we go.

My own family have potentially complex end of life situations.

Both born into Jewish families neither of my parents is religious, one is a devout atheist, the other an atheist/agnostic. They do not live near where either of their parents, any of their siblings or either me or by brother are located. So what do they want when they die? More importantly what to they want if they become incapacitated? Where do they want to be? how do they want to be cared for? Where will I find their paperwork?

My mum micro-manages their finances but their security is tight. How are we going to be able to access any of their information.? Do they have a will? (I think they do)? But where will we find it? They won't even discuss LPA's.

Who do they want to take charge? Me, as a celebrant and doula, or my brother as the 'male line' of the family. How would my brother feel if they asked me to take charge, how would I feel if it were him?

How authentic to their own beliefs do they want to be. ? Or do they want done what is traditionally expected?

And its not just my parents that should be considering these things. I and my partner need to have all this in place for our own kids and each other. Despite 30 years together, we're not married. And we have children together and separately (well he does), all of whom are grown up, and his eldest, has children too, his (our) grandkids.

Conversations need to be had,. Hopefully the inevitable is decades away, but no-one knows what's around the corner, and families.

This realisation, along with working as an End-of-Life Doula and Funeral Celebrant, are what have led me to create a comprehensive package of guides, templates, tools and supported conversations to help individuals, couples and families, think about, annotate and discuss all the practical, emotional and spiritual issues that accompany aging, potential loss of capacity and dying.